Synopsis
First Draft
Start:
Begins with a black screen, no characters visible. Diegetic noises of a teacher repeatedly calling a student’s name. An instant blink happens and focuses on a shot of the first character present. The character then gasps and the shot changes to a POV shot, the surroundings are blurred. Scene then instantly cuts.
Middle:
Scene then reopens with girl character looking at herself in the mirror, shown by an over the shoulder shot. She is uneasy and looking vacant and anxious. A drug is taken. A loop of scenes that increase with speed, including links with home life, Mum. Ending with the girl looking in the mirror back at herself. Body language decreases and becomes tired and restless.
End:
Follow downstairs using a variety of shots. POV shot, walking into room. Two Alternative Endings:
Walks into Living Room and its empty. Picture of someone on the side. Focuses on the picture…CUT
Walks into Living Room and see top of mother’s head. Walks back out, prepares food/drink in kitchen as well as putting medication out to take to mother. Walks into living room…CUT
Criticisms:
The scenes do not show an effect of the drugs that the girl has taken.
The first introduction of the scene is vague.
There are not many locations, only 2 predominant locations- school and home.
There needs to be more information into the story line because the story line is basic and isn't in depth so doesn't give a complete idea and creates a lack of understanding.
There is no indication of dialogue
This also only covers the two minute opening and the synopsis needs to cover the whole narrative.
Our next draft should be written in prose like a story and should talk about shots etc.
Second Draft
In the Dark is short film located in the social realism genre, which sets the scene with Hannah the protagonist in school, first in a classroom looking glum and unobservant. We see her throughout the day, her poor concentration continues with three separate teachers having to require for her attention. In the school bathroom, Hannah feels extremely depressed, and reaches into her denim jacket pocket and takes a clear bag out. Inside the clear bag, we see one pill which Hannah subsequently takes.
We realise that Hannah has started taking drugs regularly. As the film progresses, we learn that Hannah’s mum had died in a fatal car accident, which also left her Dad paralysed. This left Hannah with all responsibility of her younger siblings which could possibly be the reason for her substance abuse. The drug taking has a detrimental effect on Hannah’s life, with her reckless and unconsidered behaviour resulting in her losing friends. At first; her friends were lenient with moods, putting it down to her tragic loss. However one year on, her friends are unable to deal with her moods. Only one of Hannah’s friends, Sophie is able to cope with Hannah’s negativity, and therefore continues to support Hannah.
One Saturday night in November, Sophie manages to convince Hannah to come to a party with her. Hannah makes a deal which states if she goes to the party, Sophie has to try the drugs that Hannah takes. Sophie reluctantly agrees, due to the fact that she wants to see Hannah happy again. Hannah and Sophie are at the party, with all of Hannah’s old friends being present also. As they see Hannah enjoying herself, they feel inclined to speak to her and Hannah feels reunited and slightly back to normal. Yet, towards the end of the party Hannah gives one of her drugs to Sophie, which Sophie quickly swallows obliviously. Around 15 minutes after, while all the girls are dancing, Sophie suddenly collapsed. Hannah gushes with tears, panics and reaches for her phone to ring 999. The ambulance crew arrive 10 minutes later, stating that Hannah is unconscious after taking a Class a drug. Police arrive soon after and start asking where the drug came from. Hannah stays quiet, but feels so guilty that she has done this to her loyal friend.
Hannah decides to visit Sophie in hospital the next day, where she realises that her friend is in intensive care, in a critical state. The guilt overwhelms Hannah, resulting in her feeling suicidal. Hannah arrives home, to find nobody is there. Hannah sees a rope slung over the kitchen chairs and she knew immediately what she wanted to do in that moment.
Final Copy
In The Dark is a short film located within the social realism genre. The first scene is with Hannah, the protagonist, in a classroom looking glum and unobservant. We see her throughout the day; her poor concentration continues to decrease with three separate teachers having to repeat themselves for her attention. In the school bathroom, Hannah’s depression climaxes and she reaches into her denim jacket pocket and takes out a clear bag. Inside the clear bag, we see one pill which Hannah subsequently takes.
The audience start to realise that Hannah is taking drugs regularly. As the film progresses, we learn that Hannah’s mum is suffering from cancer leading to her emotional dependency as her father abandoned the family when she was at a young age. The drug taking has a detrimental effect on Hannah’s life, with her reckless and unconsidered behaviour resulting in her losing friends. At first; her friends were lenient with moods, putting it down to her tragic loss. However one year on, her friends are unable to deal with her constantly changing moods. Only one of Hannah’s friends, Sophie is able to deal with Hannah’s negativity, and therefore continues to support Hannah.
One Saturday night in November, Sophie manages to convince Hannah to come to a party with her. Hannah makes a deal which states if she goes to the party, Sophie has to try the drugs that she takes. Sophie reluctantly agrees, due to the fact that she wants to see Hannah happy again. Hannah and Sophie are at the party, with all of Hannah’s old friends being present as well. As they see Hannah enjoying herself, they feel inclined to speak to her and Hannah starts to feel she is back to normality. Yet, towards the end of the party Hannah gives one of her drugs to Sophie, which Sophie, in her drunken state, quickly swallows. Around 15 minutes after, while all the girls are dancing, Sophie suddenly collapses. Hannah bursts into tears, panics and reaches for her phone to ring 999. The ambulance crew arrive 10 minutes later, stating that Hannah is unconscious after taking a Class a drug. Police arrive soon after and start asking where the drug came from. Hannah stays quiet, but feels so guilty that she has done this to her loyal friend.
Hannah decides to visit Sophie in hospital the next day, where she realises that her friend is in intensive care, in a critical condition. The guilt overwhelms Hannah, resulting in her debating suicide. Hannah arrives home, to find nobody is in. Being alone and not knowing what to do, Hannah sees a rope slung over the kitchen chair and she knew immediately what she wanted to do…
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